Advice for the Bride-to-Be .....Victorian Style!

The 1830’s and 1840’s saw a fashion for manuals devoted to helping women fulfil their roles as both a wife and mother. The aim of these books was to stress the desirability of being the model wife in socially and domestically – advice that the modern reader may find alarmingly comical.

Respectability was everything and the key was knowing the correct etiquette. Published in 1834, ‘Hints on Etiquette and the Usages of Society, With a Glance at Bad Habits’, defined etiquette as:

“A shield against the intrusion of the impertinent, the improper and the vulgar….”

This was the book for any self-respecting bride-to-be to read and memorise….especially if you were from the country, or the offspring of wealthy working people, and therefore hopelessly unfamiliar with proper manners and customs. As the author of ‘Hints and Etiquette’ wrote:

“Shopkeepers become merchants…with the possession of wealth they acquire a taste for the luxuries of life, expensive furniture, and gorgeous plate; also numberless superfluities, the use of which they are imperfectly acquainted. But although their capacities for enjoyment increase, it rarely occurs that the polish of their manners keeps pace with the rapidity of their advancement. In all cases, the observances of the Metropolis [seat of refinement] should be received as the standard of good breeding.”

Take care introducing mutual friends....lest they be bores!

For the unwary, everything was a mine field – from introducing friends and paying a call, to whom to invite to dinner and table manners – for those not born into society, the task of fitting in must have seemed Herculean.

Even something as simple as introducing friends, was a mine field.

“Never introduce people to each other without a previous understanding that it will be agreeable to both.”

The reason runs like this:

“A stupid person may be delighted with the society of a man of learning, to whom in return such an acquaintance may prove annoyance and a clog, as one incapable of offering an interchange of thought, or an idea worth listening to.”

Harsh!

Such was the risk of introducing a bore that if unexpected thrust into the situation of, whilst walking with a friend, bumping into an acquaintance not know to that friend, “Never introduce them.” The risk of them proving not to be a kindred spirit was too great!

Neither, should you take an uninvited friend, to the home of another, because:

“….there is always a feeling of jealousy that another should share our thoughts and feelings to the same extend as themselves, although good breeding will induce them to behave civilly to your friend on your account.”

In Wednesday’s post – I expound on the ritual of “Calling” – what was proper, and what was improper, as outlined in the 1850 manual, “How to Behave – A Pocket Manual of Etiquette.”

Gathered by Virgins.

There’s something about a good cup of tea that lubricates thought and helps the day go more smoothly. My parents drink tea by the bucket full, whereas I mainly drink it at work. There are cultural differences to; I believe tea is much less popular in America than it is here in the UK, but strangely the Portuguese and Dutch are big tea drinkers. Anyhow, when tea was first introduced to Britain in the mid 17^th century, wild claims about its health benefits ensured its popularity.

In 1657 Thomas Garway, proprietor of a coffee house in Exchange Alley in London claimed tea was “gathered by virgins” and “makes a body active and lusty”. This miracle elixir also; “preserves perfect health until extreme old age”, “vanquishes nightmares” and “dispenses with the need for sleep.”

King Charles II.

When the court of Charles II, influenced by his Portuguese wife Catherine of Braganza, started drinking tea its popularity rose to the point of a drop in alcohol consumption amongst the masses. This had the knock on effect of lowering revenue from alcohol sales and so government quickly increased the tax on tea (reaching a peek in the mid 1750’s when it stood at over 100%.)

One concern Charles II had was that tea drinking encouraged small groups to assemble over a brew and increased opportunities for seditious plotting. So in 1675 Charles forbad the sales of tea to private houses. Such was the outrage that he was forced to revoke the law within a week of its issue.

The Cutty Sark in full sail.

The market to tea was huge and the profits for those importing were immense. The East India Company recognized this and rapidly monopolized the sea trade with its fleet of tea clippers such as the Cutty Sark. The streamlined, tall masted sailing vessels could reach speeds of nearly 18 knots, which was extraordinary at the time.

Charles Harrod was a tea wholesaler before he opened his famous shop.

But when in the late 1700’s tax made the price of tea prohibitive to many people, there were unscrupulous traders who ‘cut’ tea with sloe leaves, liquorice and even the dried dregs from tea pots. It took action by William Pitt the Younger in 1784 to recognize what was happening and save the quality of the great British cupper. He reduced the tax on tea to 12.5% and a year later brought in the ‘Food and Drug Act’ which promoted harsh penalties for adulterating tea. However it wasn’t until well over a century later in 1879 that someone thought to inspect tea at the site of import to ensure purity.

NEXT POST (Sunday)– The ritual of tea drinking, plus how to brew the perfect cupper.

Medicating Cats - Victorian Style - 2 of 2.

[CONGRATULATIONS TO JENNIFER  - who is the winner of the $20 Amazon voucher - LOVE GIVEAWAYS BLOG HOP.
Jennifer has been notified and her voucher sent and I'd like to say a BIG thank you to every who took the time to enter. Grace ]

Last week we looked at how, in Victorian times, a cat’s reluctance to take medicine might help keep her alive. This week, we consider some of the remedies commonly inflicted on these poor, unsuspecting animals. 

Vomiting.

Now as any cat owner knows, it’s perfectly normal for a cat to vomit from time to time. However if the vomiting became excessive, one Victorian remedy was to:

“Mix half a teaspoon of salt in two teaspoons of water then dose the cat with this emetic to clear the stomach of toxins.”

Please do NOT follow this advice; it is incredibly dangerous and akin to poisoning your pet. Felines are adapted to a carnivorous, and therefore, low salt diet. Their kidneys are not designed to process salt and giving a salt emetic in this way could lead to renal failure (I suppose one hope is that the cat vomits before any of the salt can be absorbed across the stomach wall.)

Malaise.

Now if the hapless Victorian cat was suffering from excessive malaise and lethargy, the answer was:

‘A small dose of brimstone, keep the cat warm and fed on light biscuit spread with butter.’

Oh dear. Brimstone is another name for sulfur; the element used in gunpowder, matches, insecticides and pesticides. Although skin ointments contained sulfur were effective against ringworm and skin afflictions, they worked mainly by cauterization…not the best idea then to make a cat swallow brimstone…

Fits and Delirium.

Charles Ross in his 1868 book ‘Chit Chat Book of the Cat’ defines a cat with delirium as having:

“An uneasy restlessness and wildness of eye. In a bad case the cat may rush around with staring eyes and throw himself at a window.”

[Reminds me of Gromit, my hunting cat when I tried to keep him indoors for his own safety during a firework display!]

The remedy?

“Slightly slit one ear with a sharp pair of scissors in the thin part of the ear.”

I suppose the one good thing about this advice is that it doesn’t involve poisoning the cat, but wait…oh no! Mr Ross goes on to say:

“Or a good alternative is a salt water emetic.”

Presumably this works because the cat is too weak from kidney failure to be delirious any more – or perhaps I’m being cynical!

NEXT WEEK: Where the superstition of a cat having nine lives came from.